Why We Need Healthy Containers
by Rachael Starr Bruck
People need spaces where they can simply be seen and heard, without judgment and without repercussion.
This sounds simple, I know, but in truth it’s a rare thing, even amongst friends and family, the people closest to us.
How often do you find yourself in a space where you are able to open up about your life fully, and share your fears and concerns, your hopes and joys, your struggles and challenges?
Probably not too often, and yet you know the value of such times is immense.
We’re Not Taught How to Navigate Massive Change
Given all that is happening in our societies, mental and emotional health issues are on the rise. And one of the reasons is that sweeping change, disruption, crisis and breakdown are not things we are taught to navigate. No school teaches ‘what to do when carpet is pulled from underfoot.’
If you are like us at the Center, we’re concerned with how to support those who cannot best support themselves, particularly on a mental/emotional level.
But in order for us to do that, we ourselves need to learn how to navigate such times. It’s not something we are taught as part of our life education, and yet it’s exceedingly valuable, especially given what’s happening to ourselves and the people around us.
A Held Space is a Container
At the Center, we focus on teaching how to ‘hold space.’ In essence, holding space is the act of creating intentional, healthy and courageous ‘containers’ for relationship and dialogue.
One of the misconceptions people have about holding space is it’s something we do for others. In a sense that’s true – the container is a space held for all who enter in – but what can happen is that when we hold that perspective, holding space can feel like something you must do when you see people in distress or emotional turmoil.
Here is the reality:
Holding space is first and foremost a way of holding ourselves in order to empower our own transformative growth, ground ourselves in the wisdom and courage of the heart, and strengthen our connection to the life force that flows through all things.
A Held Space Creates Healthy Boundaries
Those of us who are in helping professions or in fields that support personal development (from coaches and therapists to teachers and leaders), are susceptible to giving too much of ourselves away, unconsciously taking in all the energies around us (as empaths do), and not making enough time for our own needs. We can lack healthy boundaries.
This is where the immense value of the ‘container’ comes in.
In alchemy it is known that a vessel is needed to turn lead into gold. It’s the same for ourselves: without a container to do the inner work, we cannot effectively know who we are or take true care of ourselves.
Yes, that’s right, the capacity to hold space begins with ourselves.
You Become the Container
You probably know how to engage in daily acts of self-care – putting your feet up at the end of the day, watching an enjoyable TV show, going for a walk, or taking a bath – the bigger questions is:
Do you know the extraordinary value of committing to intentional practices that strengthen your connection to your highest self and truth, and to the ground of being that is the source of intelligence greater than yourself?
Most folks do not. And yet it’s this capacity in you that then extends out into the world as a greater container for others. It’s not then something you do, it’s something you are.
If you are concerned about the state of your family, community, organization or society, rather than worrying about where it’s all going, become a part of the solution, a part of what the world needs: a courageous, capable ‘vessel tender.’
The greater the number of safe spaces that exist in which people feel seen and supported, the sooner we will see a renewed world come into existence.
Learn to Hold Space – it’s something we teach well 🙂
Are you ready to learn what it takes to create healthy containers of possibility?
Our 8-week Holding Space course starts soon. You will grow in ways you do not expect.
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